Being obese is about covering things up. We cover up pain. We cover up our past. We cover up our failures and mistakes. We cover up our anxiety, fear, stress, anger… We cover things up.
Sometimes it is even about covering up the fact we are obese.
We eat when we are stressed. We eat when we are bored. We eat when we are alone. We even eat when we are sick.
And we are always looking for that next meal. Just to cover up our hunger.
We are hiding beneath our obesity.
I remember a time when my wife was on a vacation trip with her sister. I was home alone. I went through an entire box of Bisquick, a large jar of peanut butter, all the butter in the house and a large jar of syrup, all in one day.
I remember a time when I was in so much physical pain I could barely make it around the aisles of the local Braum’s store. After stocking up on two boxes of ice cream, peanut butter and anything else I could get my hands on, I stopped for drive-thru pizza on the way home. The next day I had to repeat this step because I was all out of food.
I remember entire weeks, day after day, where I purchased the biggest bag of peanut M&M’s I could find along with at least two other bags of chocolate or sour candies. The purchases happened on the way home from stressful work days. The candy was gone before bedtime.
But nothing compares to the indescribable binges that took place at the end of visits with my oldest daughter, or worse, after those times I was turned away, without seeing her at all.
Recently in a conversation with God, He reminded me of this; He is my cover. He is my shield. He is my righteousness. No matter what others think of me, He is there to cover me.
Surely, Lord, you bless the righteous;
you surround them with your favor as with a shield. – Psalm 5:12 NIV
That is why the first step in this journey had to begin with a conversation with Him. – See Conversations
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